The Last Two Weeks

Things have been pretty busy during the last couple of weeks and I probably won't be able to share all of the happenings but...some of the important events were a trip to Colorado, then a continuing trip to Utah, returning to Colorado and now we are awaiting word about a car so that we can head out to Wisconsin.

Mike (my brother) had asked for a family meeting so that we might discuss the issues that we are facing as a family. Dad has been experiencing quite a bit of dementia lately and it is becoming apparent that the time is coming when he will no longer be able to stay alone. His doctor is also requesting health agent and advance directive paperwork.

You always hear about families that have such a difficult time when it comes to making these kinds of decisions. In truth, I had been a little anxious about this meeting...anyone who knows us will know that we are all "chiefs" and not one of us is an "Indian!" LOL However, we started our meeting with a prayer and I believe that set the tone and gave us great compassion and concern for our Dad and united us in our efforts to make decisions that will bless his life and brought us together in recognizing the stresses and concerns for the various families that are so involved in Dad's care.

While I was there I had the opportunity to talk with Dad and remember.... I also had the opportunity to go with Dad to the doctor for his appointments for his prostate biopsy and for his catarract consult. The catarract surgery won't be for a few months and they will do the worst eye first. At first Dad was quite resistent. I believe that he thought that they were going to do the surgery that day and I could see that he was frazzled. He had had the biopsy the day before and it was taxing on him. I was reminded as I watched him stress that he really has a gentle spirit and was always mindful of us...and in our effort to improve his quality of life I think we sometimes don't realize how frail he really is...I don't want to paint him as an invalid...he isn't! But since none of us are 81 I don't think we realize how much the aging process takes out of us until we're the one doing it.

The results of the biopsy came back and Mike and Dad went into the doctor Monday to learn about what Dad is facing. The good news is that while the tumors are stage 7 & 8 (aggressive) the cancer itself is a slow growing kind and will probably not be his cause of death. It appears that there has been no metastises but they well be doing a bone scan to verify that. The result of the scan will determine the course of treatment.

While I have been with Desi and Mike I have had the opportunity to enjoy Emily and Mordecai in "real life." The other day I had gone to do something and when I returned Emily said (in a very relieved tone), "There you are! I was bewildered about where you were!" I had to chuckle. The last few days everything has been "ridiculous!" Yesterday I went to get a pedicure at my favorite place in the lower 48. I took Emily with me. As we drove out of North Park she gave me directions about where to go and where to turn. As we pulled in to the parking spot and I was getting her out she told me (in a very serious manner), "After we get done here I will be able to speak Chinese." I responded with, "You will?" and she said, "Yes. I don't know why but I will." I had to chuckle once more. Obviously she recognizes that the technicians are of Asian descent, and even that they speak another language (they are actually Vietnamese)...but who would have guessed her response.

Mordecai continues to have difficulty with his bowels and the poor little guy really struggles. Desi is going to consult with her pediatrician and we sure hope that it is nothing of any consequence. He is a funny little guy. He LOVES trains and tracks, balls and cars. He is all boy. His speech is pretty articulate too. Today Desi took Mike to work and I watched them while she was gone. Mordecai was doing just fine until he realized that Desi was gone. He started to sob and cried for his momma. I tried to help him but that just made matters worse. He finally decided that he would share his concerns with Emily. "Emmowee, I scawoold!" (Emily, I scared!) he cried over and over. Emily told him that it was okay and that Grandma was here and that she was too. Moments later Desi walked in and all the tears were gone.

On our return from Utah Desi and Mike's car was acting up...not terribly...but Mike is understandable concerned about us traveling alone to Wisconsin without knowing that the car is okay. They took it to their mechanic...but we have yet to hear about its status. I was so hoping to be on the road to Wisconsin by at least today...I sure hope it is tomorrow at the latest!