Today has been an emotional roller coaster. We started our fast yesterday as we knew that some of our family would be fasting today and we wanted to join in, knowing that the biopsy will be Wednesday and I had requested a blessing from Rich and another Elder of his choosing. All morning I struggled to gain control of my emotions. One minute I was able to concentrate and then the next I was worried and fearful. I have been praying for peace and understanding, and to have my faith strengthened, knowing that no matter what the outcome, I will need these great blessings. The messages of Sacrament Meeting, Sunday School, and Relief Society were all tailor made for me it seemed. After meetings I met Rich and Brother Dahl for a blessing. I knew that Rich would be ever stalwert, but anxious as I think this blessing seemed to loom so large. As Brother Dahl anointed and Rich sealed the anointing with the blessing, my tears flowed freely, and peace descended. It has remained with me all day and I count it a the most exquisite blessing!
These last few days I have ever considered more deeply the character of the Savior. As I have struggled to keep my balance, to keep focused on the important, to not give in to the fear I have contemplated how extraordinary the Savior's last days, maybe even weeks and months must have been. There is no evidence that he EVER turned from the throngs of followers that sought his help, the teaching that he continued to do, the organizing of his kingdom, and I'm sure that his own personal needs for rest and food were often the last things he did. And, yet, he must have been weighed down mightily by the knowledge of what would shortly come to pass...The Mt. Of Olives...the trial...the scourging...Calvary...and yet he persisted in being about his Father's will instead of worrying about his own health and welfare. If anyone had reason to run or fear, it was him! But he steadfastly stayed the course. He stayed focused on others, his mission, his Father in Heaven. Wow! What big shoes I have to follow!
To continue with my life story questions....
When Dad went to Korea, Mom and I went to live with my Gandmother Roskelley in Concord, California. I've always felt a deep connection to my Grandma. Perhaps it is because of the time that I spent there with her at this time. Who knows?
Mom tried her best to help me know my Dad through photos and letter, but I was just 4 or 5 months old when he left and nearly two when he returned. Evidently she had a photo of my Dad in his army uniform and when my Uncle Vance came home I assumed he was my Daddy, because he wore a uniform and was male. He was my "favorite" uncle, by the way! Lol
It was while we were staying with Grandma that my Grandfather passed away...in July 1954. I believe Mom was there when he died. And, I believe that his last words were something to the effect of, "take care of your mom". I've always wondered how his wife must have felt about that...but I think he really did love my Grandma, even though they had had such a rocky relationship.
As I have been doing work to get through mountains of paperwork and old pics I have had the opportunity to look into her and Grandpa. I don't know much. She was born in Massachussetts and was married previously, with three children from that marriage. I called Cathy and Gayle (my cousins) to see what they knew, especially since she hadn't died until 1984. I don't remember ever meeting her in all the trips we made to California as a kid. Gayle's mother intimated to her that Catherine (Gandpa's wife) had been kind of a money grubber....although I can't imagine that Grandpa had anything much to grub! Lol! Kathy just dismissed the inquiry - probably because she really doesn't know anything more than I do. Neither of them have any memory of her. I did a cursory check on the kids and found her and her first husband and kids on a 1940 census and then found a death record for the husband. It would seem that they (the family) ought to be sealed. I need to see about where the temple work stands.
Also - I pulled my Grandma's adoption record and will work to get the work ready to have her sealed to him. I think she deserves that...however...I will fast and pray about that this coming Sunday before I do it. And I'll prepare his parents family at the same time.
When Dad came home from Korea and Japan Mom and Dad stayed in Pacific Grove for a few months until Dad was separated. When Joey and Carlie had Gideon, Mom and Dad were able to come to the blessing. We slipped out afterwards for a trip down there and it was fun to take a walk down memory lane with them.
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