Philip Orion Bainbridge

Thirty-one years ago, when I was pregnant with Phil, I hadn't dreamed that he would be born on this day, the 15th and on Grandma's birthday. I wasn't due until the 28th. We had gone to church the day before (the 14th) and someone had asked Rich if he could do something on the 28th and he had responded with , "Yeah. Sure." But I had reminded him that that was our due date and the guy looked at Rich and said, "You sure?" Rich retorted, "Absolutely!" Then cocking his head in my direction, and with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, he added, "She's a woman, and you know how it is with a woman, she's never been on time for anything, let alone early!"

Well, we went home and did all the normal Sunday activities but as evening came I recognized the familiar pains of labor. When I told Rich I was in labor he quipped with, "This is just your way of getting back at me for making that crack in church!. You just had to go a make a liar out of me, didn't you?!" LOL

The next morning, 31 years ago today, at Hill Air Force Base, in Utah he arrived. He weighed in at 8 lb. 7 oz., 20 1/2 inches long, but his head was huge - 14 7/8 inches around! (some will still say that is one of his defining characteristics! LOL)

He came home from the hospital with thrush and a staph infection...and things just went downhill from there. In fact, he wasn't blessed until the 4th of March because he had been so ill.

We named him Philip (his Dad's middle name) Orion (the hunter constellation - because we knew he grow to manhood and assume the sacred responsibility of caring and providing for his family and loved ones). However, when we shared with family what we had decided my mother looked quite confused. "Where did you get the name Philip?" she asked. "It's Rich's middle name" we told her. "I thought his name was 'Partridge?'" We laughed really hard over that. For years I had feigned exasperation or other emotion and blurted, "Richard Partridge Bainbridge!!!!!" over some inane point. I have no idea where the name Partridge came from - his middle initial was "P" and I just inserted "Partridge." It was a little play between us but I had never dreamed that anyone ever seriously thought that his name was Partridge!

For the next few years we seemed to live at the doctors' offices and at the hospitals. He had serious ear problems with attendant hearing losses (and although they would eventually be solved - the accompanying speech delays and endless speech therapy would plague him for many years).

We have some fun memories of him as he worked on speech. He was just a little guy (only 2 when he started therapy - and he worked very hard. As articulation improved it allowed his cute little humor to emerge. One day he was teasing me and he called me a "Kazy Mudda." I loved it. I shared that with my mom and dad, who were also rooting for his progress, and they just hooted. It was very reminiscent of an old "Rowan and Martin, Laugh In" tv spot with a song that went something like, "Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda, Here I am - at Camp Granada!" To this day, often my Dad will ask "How's the Kazy Mudda?" or "You're a good, Kazy Mudda" or something on that line.

We also learned a lot about speech and revelled in his progress, especially as he finally overcame his "f" for "tr" substitution in the immediate position. He loved playing with cars and trucks - but saying "truck" with the "f" substitution wasn't so cool. LOL

Decoding Phil's speech was difficult at first. We knew he was trying desperately to talk to us - but we couldn't understand. However, that wasn't really the case with Wanda and to a lesser extent, Joey. Often they would be able to understand enough of what he was trying to say that they could interpret it for us or get it close enough. Phil called her "A-ma" and she responded.

Another memory that comes to mind (actually Rich reminded me of this one after reading what I had written) is as Mary (the speech therapist) worked with Phil she would try to help him master basic information, such as name, address, etc. For weeks she had worked with him on his name. "Philip" is harder than some because of the "l". When she would ask him his name we would respond, "Fo up." Gradually it got better and better and so she started working on helping him with his last name. So one day she asked him "What is you name?" He responded, "Fi-e ip." That was progress and Mary praised him for his efforts. Then, "What is your other name?" He responded with "Meathead." That sure wasn't what Mary thought he was going to respond with! He has had that nickname for as long as I can remember - and I don't even know the genesis of it. Another nickname is "Philly-Bob" - but I'll save that for another post:)

Our experiences with him probably made me more hyper-vigilant than I should be...but I really am a fierce advocate of being proactive in this arena. Watching him be frustrated and embarrassed because he couldn't get others to understand what he was trying to say or suffering the mocking and teasing of others who would be cruel is not something I handle well - and every child deserves to hear and be heard.

Phil turned 5 the first day that we got to Germany. He was pretty excited. We had just driven across the U.S. in the dead of winter, flown on a VERY crowded flight from the States, were experiencing the effects of jet lag, and it was his birthday - he, Joey, and Wanda could NOT sleep! More than once I admonished them about jumping on the beds! We did have cake and ice cream and open a few little gifts - but he was wired!

When we first got to Germany we lived in an apartment building in the bedroom community of Kaiserslautern called Siegelbach. It was close to K-Town but had the small village charm. And it even had a small "Tierpark" or zoo. As spring came to our little town Wanda was given the assignment at school of finding some tadpoles or polywogs and bring them in. She, Joey and Phil were thrilled with the opportunity of getting out of the house and exploring town. Rich walked with them down the streets and towards the tierpark where a little stream ran through town. When they came to an area that was safe enough for them Philip was utterly amazed. "Wow! Look at all those polywogs! I've never seen so many polywogs in all my life! They must be having church! Maybe even stake conference!" he exclaimed. It was just too precious! He had never seen a polywog before, in all his life, that we knew of - and you could definitely tell what his frame of reference was for a large gathering!

The day that we brought Cherstin home from the hospital the kids were wired then too. Joey and Philip were playing some stupid game - Joey would put a marble up his nose and then pull it out. Phil tried the same thing. But his nose was smalled than Joey's and it didn't come out! They presented the problem to us and we tried to get the marble out but by this time Phil was crying and the nasal juices were flowing and we couldn't get it out either, it just rolled and rolled in the nasal cavity. So, Rich took Phil up to Landstuhl Hospital to see what they could do. As they were driving up there Rich had a great opportunity to talk about personal responsibility when Philip told him that it was "Joey's fault I'm in this mess!" "Did Joey put the marble up your nose?" "No...but..." We have laughed about that conversation repeatedly over the years - even used it in a talk once for YW values!

Phil was baptized in January of 1987 in Kaiserslautern, Germany. I always found it somewhat ironic - that Joey and Phil would be baptised in the same building that their Dad and I met.

Phil has a kind heart and easy disposition. One of my favorite memories was him playing with Felicia. He and Felicia were making a video to send to Joey while he was on his mission. They were using Barbie dolls (why? I have no idea!!!) and they were using the piano bench on which to act out their little play. I have the video somewhere I think, perhaps I will find it and upload it some day! He always had a special spot in his heart for his little sisters and he was always willing to play with them - in fact - that was how Desi broke her arm the first time! LOL In fact - I don't know that he ever really got the point when they weren't wanting to play anymore!

He was always a good student - just would procrastinate sometimes:) - quick to grasp concepts and ideas - also quick to realize that he would rather do the work of GATE classes than be in boring normal ones. LOL He was kind of geeky, or nerdy (that didn't stop him from taking 5 girls to prom at the same time)...video and computer games were fun and there seemed to always be members of the "Geek Squad" over to play - although he also loved to play chess, football, basketball, and diplomacy with his friends. Wanda and he also had a special bond with games too - but mostly I remember them playing monopoly - hmmm.

Phil took German in high school but we never really thought that would be put to much use - until he received his mission call to Germany. What I even find more ironic is that he served for a time in the same areas that we had lived, shopped, and worked. I remember him even asking me one day, "This building (the Kaiserslautern chapel) looks awfully familiar. Was I ever here?"

After Phil was home from his mission for a few weeks he went to stay with Wanda and Robert. He sure enjoyed his time with them and they were very good to him. It was there that he finally started to attend the singles ward and met Hannah. And the rest is history, so to speak.

He has grown into a wonderful young man in whom we are so proud and glad. He is the adoring husband of Hannah and the wonderful father of cute little Orion and William. His is teaching Primary and even considering teaching in some way and at some time for some part of his career. He is still going to school but hoping that will be done shortly. And we know that as he keeps plodding along it will be.

Some things don't change too much - he still loves to play games and when we get together we often (usually) play a game or two (even though it is harder because of little ones). These are some of my most precious memories. In fact, I believe that playing games in this way has strengthened the family bonds between siblings, spouses, parents and children and grandparent and grandchild, and niece or nephew and aunt and uncle immeasurably...and as we move to include the next generation - we've got to get a bigger table!;) Happy Birthday Phil - and many, many , many more!