Remembering

Today is my grandmother, Wanda Bingham Roskelley's 110th birthday. She is such a wonderful person - such an elect lady. It is only now that I think I even get the significance of her role in my life. She taught me to crochet, to sew, to piece and to tie quilts, to do genealogy, to make bread and pies. Recipes that she made to feed her little family through the dark days of the depression still live with us today - "hamburgers in gravy" is one of my favorites but the one that probably gets used most frequently is "hamburger gravy." I love her crystal pickles (as does Wanda) and banana bread and lemon meringue pie. She was frugal and generous, kind and consistent, thrifty and industrious. I can NEVER remember her ever sitting in a chair with her hands idle - she was either crocheting, studying the scriptures, working a crossword puzzle, or doing something else for the benefit of others. I can't ever remember her ever saying a negative word about anything or anybody either - a trait I admire and would so like to develop. She loved tomatoes and raspberries, and cucumbers in vinegar. She loved to learn and I still have a book of drawings that she made for her biology class when she was in school in Valparaiso, Indiana that are absolutely stunning in their detail and artistry. She held high standards and I can remember her saying things like, "a job's not done if it isn't done right." She insisted on proper English and dress. She loved going to the temple and she loved family history. She didn't like the tv series "Mash" or "I Love Lucy." I suspect Mash was because of losing her son in the Korean conflict. Now, I Love Lucy - I am just guessing - but I think she probably thought that it was stupid and insipid - but it's just a guess. She had a difficult childhood and life - but she never complained. She loved her children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren fiercely. She loved my Mom and taught her so very well. And she loved me. I love you, Grandma. I am so grateful that you were born!

Today I had a thought that I ought to write a brief synopsis of what happened last year before I forget...I always think that will never happen, especially when things have been particularly momentous...but time really does take it's toll and I am always amazed at how fuzzy things can become so fast. I find that I can often remember an event, but placing it in time can be difficult. And then, who's to say I even remember the event at all! LOL

Anyway - I will try to put this in some kind of chronological order because that may be the best chance I have of remembering.

In October of 2008, on Conference Weekend, Felicia had a car accident that totaled her car. Rich had come home to help pack up the moving truck and drive it out to Tennessee - but he and I stopped for a few hours and bought a van for us so that we could give our car to Felicia to use. The next couple of weeks I finished packing (with the help of friends, family, and ward) out of the house we were renting in Westminster, Colorado, cleaned it, and moved in with Desi and Mike.

In November I then drove to Utah so that I could get Felicia the car and other things she wanted and needed. I spent a week there with Dad and got to see my brothers and their families and Felicia. I had been back to Utah in June/July (with Wanda and her little brood, Cherstin and Abby and Emmett, Hannah and Orion, and Felicia) while Felicia looked over BYU. Then I had driven out with her in August/September when she returned for school and stayed for Jenna's wedding. And, while things hadn't radically changed in that amount of time I was glad to have the chance to get back there before our move to Tennessee. I flew back to Denver and shortly Rich and Felicia joined me and Desi and Mike, Mordecai and Emily for Thanksgiving. We had a lovely time with everyone and then we said our goodbyes and packed up a trailer with some of the things that were left from the packing of the house and my personal belongings and drove out to Tennessee. We stopped for a couple of days in Oklahoma with Cherstin and Dan but we were anxious to get back and get things put away so that Rich could get back to work.

In December (just a few weeks later)Rich and I drove back through Oklahoma (staying a couple of days again with Cherstin and Dan) and on in to Colorado for Christmas with Desi, Mike, Emily, Mordecai, and Felicia. We had a lovely time again but this trip had been planned specifically (the the added bonus of Christmas with the kids) to get out of the storage units that we had there and to get my plants and get home. So we packed out of the storage units, packed up the plants, said our goodbyes, and headed east.

Now this is where my memory is fading already - hmmm - maybe I do have Alzheimer's! I would call Desi and ask her because I know she would remember - but I think I'll just let this stand as a testament to how quickly timing of events can fade and hopefully I (along with anyone else who reads this) will learn to record when things happened and not later on. Anyway - Desi had been having a long battle with kidney stones. All through her pregnancy with Mordecai and then afterwards. I specifically remember her Dad being with me and Emily and Mordecai too while we took her for tests and to dr. appointments. But I think these were during the Thanksgiving period because Emily got hooked watching Polar Express in our van while waiting for Desi and that was a lifesaver. I also remember that Rich and I talked about getting her a copy of the movie for Christmas and that Desi told me Emily was watching it on tv one night before we got there. But I believe Desi had one of her many surgeries just as we were leaving from Christmas (and it could have been Thanksgiving 0 SEE!!!) At any rate - I felt awful about leaving. She had been through so much and yet I needed to complete the move and we had time constraints, etc. Lexie Ludwig and Crystal were there to help her for the few days right after the surgery. I was so grateful to our church family. My heart was breaking as I pulled away from the curb but I was so confident in her care and recovery that I felt to express my gratitude to one and all.

As we drove east through Kansas we then headed northeast into Nebraska and Iowa and finally into Wisconsin to drop things off at Wanda's and Hannah's - especially plants. It had turned bitter cold and while the plants were in the back of our van as opposed to the trailer - some did not fare very well. In fact - a year later and some of these are still making their way back. We then left Wisconsin and headed south for Tennessee.

Rich's back had been bothering him and he had thought it was the bed. He put an eggshell foam cover on it - helped some. Tried nerve stimulation, therapy, analgesics, pain meds, nothing seemed to help very much. So finally Dr. May referred him to a neurosurgeon here in Oak Ridge. We went to see him in January. Going there we were reminded that you never know when the Church and the gospel might become the topic of conversation. He had given us a history to fill out and on it they wanted the names and ages of all of our children (who knows why?). As he went over the list he noted that we had six children to which he responded, "What are you, Mormon or something?" To which Rich responded, "Well, yes, we are!" We watched the red flush of embarrassment completely cover his face as he struggled to know how to respond. After what seemed to be 5-10 seconds he responded that he had known a few Mormons in his life and, "they were actually some very nice people." We have laughed about it over and over - you never know who is watching you!

Anyway - he (the neurosurgeon) found from the MRI that Rich had actually broken a vertebrae in his back, and while the discs were bulging in the area, he didn't think that was the problem. He thought the break was causing a pinched nerve and recommended that he go to a pain specialist who could deaden the nerve with radio-frequency procedures - and if that didn't work then he would fuse his back. Well, we saw the pain specialist and after a series of procedures - he has been relatively pain free. Yeah! Modern medicine is sure nice when it works!